STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
another moral hangover. fuck.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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