You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
