whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize