so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
