Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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