found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
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