he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
