i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
How did I end up in the pool?!
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Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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