I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize