I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
