yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.