apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize