Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize