i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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