is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Randomize
