your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize