Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
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