Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Can I color on your dick again?
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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