i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
