I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize
