her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
