I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
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