I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I just want nice things and good sex
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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