Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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