It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
so that wasnt chicken after all
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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