my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Randomize
