I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
