can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Someone shit on the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize