careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
