My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.