no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize