Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Randomize
