Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
we should paint friendship bongs
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
