so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
My vagina is very pro this idea
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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