we're blogging at a bar
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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