Are we in a gay sports bar?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
