Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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