there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
