I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
