omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
