Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
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