I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
