big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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