Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
