I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
