More tranny stories later!
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
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