I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
