So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
