ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I'm always down for nudity.
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