Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
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