both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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